.

Last week, my friend was dumped. We talked about guys and codependency, and about wanting the most of out life. It was a deep and therapeutic talk for both of us; well, it was definitely tired drama for me. So, last night my friend and his man got back together. I'm happy for them, they are obviously in love with each other. It just made me realize how I can't do that, I can't be in a relationship right now. No matter how much I want to be with someone I care about, I can't handle it. So, after this epiphany, things for me are good.

Jordan pissed on me last night, I feel validated.

If someone ever belittles you...

Equate me

I think it's funny how two people can look at the same thing and draw different conclusions. 

Naw, I'm good

My weekend has left me with a raspy voice, that's how grand it was. It is my homage to the memories created during my short stay in Seattle. 

To sum up my weekend:

- Danced to crappy music for four hours on Thursday night. 

- While I was in the HoneyBucket, my friend Katie was outside smoking a cigarette. A homeless gent approached her, I yelled from inside the portable-bathroom, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM HER!" 

- Witnessed Cops, Fireman and fat women in tube tops going ape shit after someone shot to people at Folklife while I was there.

- Saw more hippies than God himself knew he created.

- Had an attractive asian guy (I know, what you're thinking, but he actually was cute) throw me into the bathroom stall and eat my face. It was decent. 

- Had a cholo knife fight. 

- Went on a roller-coaster with Jordan, the loudest man in existence. 

- Tristan made chili/curry/delicious corn on the cob with roasted artichoke. 

- Made friends with countless lesbians/men/people due to my friend Donovan guiding me around the largest gay bar in Seattle and introducing me to EVERYONE he knew. 

- Went to my friends dad's funeral, didn't know the words to the hymn, so I muttered "Gimme More" by Britney Spears under my breath. Distasteful? Me? Never. 

- At the same funeral, did the whole communion shabang, but accidently ate the piece of bread seductively from the preacher's hand. 

- Proceeded to eat twice my weight in cheese and crackers at the same funeral.

HIGHLIGHT OF THE WEEKEND:

Okay, so on the way to Folklife, my friends and I hear this crazy ass dinosaur like sound. We look up at the roof top this building next to us to see:

Two seagulls at it like no tomorrow. That male seagull is balls deep, it's okay the female likes it. Look at their experience, what a moment of ecstasy. Little do you know they are fucking on a...

CHURCH! How classic.

Yes, my weekend was indeed a feat to be observed. 

Drunk posts are funny.

Best. Weekend. Ever.

Look, he's a hawk-whisperer. HOW CUTE!

I'm no cowardly lion

Maybe this could be a venting space? Would that be hypocritical? Yes.

Thank you for the memories, but I can't budge. After being so open with you, I can't close myself again. It's sad, but it's how things are. 

MAN, that aside, what a glorious weekend! I have hung out with my besties from my childhood and now, and we have been getting cutting loose. There will be pictures, yes, you best believe. 

Now, I just need to motivate them to venture into the wilderness of Seattle or manifest their creativity; either/or really.

Feast on this: 

Who am I trying to impress?

I was told I need to write more entries about my life. So, here is what my hands are telling me to say.

I try to lead an interesting life, I don't like to waste moments and/or my time with friends. This causes me to always be on the go, even when I'm sitting down. However, my days are numbered. I am a wanted man. Life is nipping at my gluts and I will have to grow up uncomfortably soon. It's time though, I'm ready for an upgrade. I just hope some of my current lifestyle will transfer over to the next stage. I don't want to lose anyone, especially you.

Lately, I have been felt stretched thin. All the different roles in my life have demanded my attention, causing me to lose sleep, and this isn't okay. I love my sleep, it's almost important to me as a Monte Cristo. I may be a glutton, but I promise it all goes to good use! Back on topic, this stress is making me feel selfish for doing what I want to do. I feel like I can't piss without pissing off someone.

To be completely honest, I've been going through somewhat of an identity crisis for the past month. I don't know what I enjoy to do anymore, I don't know where I begin and my friends end. Am I just a culmination of each good quality of my friends and family? My mom did say I'm like each other my brothers. Does that mean I'm a sponge with no originality? It's been hard for me to understand myself and what makes me tick. I don't know what's brought this self doubt on, but it's there and hard to shake. That doesn't mean I'm down on myself, I'm just trying to rediscover who I am and who I want to be. 

Things aren't gray though. The sun was out this weekend, causing me to find outdoor refuge from my different priorities. There's nothing like splashing, kayaking and eating tacos from a taco trunk to define your weekend.

In summation, a warm body would be nice.

Tremors

Here are a few of my favorite things:

Flashin' My Goods

I have a rip on the ass of my shorts. I think it was caused by studying. 

Do you ever wish people could read your thoughts? I do, I think it would make understanding my thought process a lot easier. Note to self: invent thought-megaphone. 

Being vulnerable isn't easy, but when you know the person loves you and cares selflessly about you, it should come naturally. I have this problem, I need to be like this chick:

 

Delicious Dish

Pigeons, like geese, are assholes.

I'm Thirsty

Man, it is hot up near the Canadian border! But you know what that means— lemonade, underwear and SWIMMING. I don't think I could ever live away from a large body of water. THINK OF HOW BORING IT WOULD BE! Water provides opportunities to be hilarious! Seagulls, for instance, pass as quite the tickler.  

Did you know the speed of sound in water is 1,435 m/sec—nearly five times faster than the speed of sound in air! Bet ya didn't know that, huh? Now, you can tell your mom and she will think you are actually learning something in college! Psshh... College—hard to call what will happen to my friendships after it. 

Okay, back to the hot day, you always need a good/awesome/amazing soundtrack for nice days like these. THE HEAT MAKES ME THIRSTY FOR SOME VIBES. That is why, everyone needs to check out the Black Ghosts. Their music makes my brain feel funnay. For example:

Think of the meaning of the video, man! THE IMPLICATIONS! THINK OF THE IMPLICATIONS!! 

Okay, well it's time to rent a boat. 

Pretty Little Ditty

This is dedicated to you, baby—just stop already. 

Maybe it's the deviance of it?

SNAP!

Alien furniture, how delightful. 

SNAP!

Hey Mom, aren't I great?

My Livejournal is going to have nothing on this. 

I'm not going to use this as an avenue to vent my life frustrations. I intend to discuss the quirks, quivers and all that is hilarious within this space. Blogging about drama is passive-aggressive and that ain't me. 

You know what's funny? Everything, you can find anything funny. To quote one of my good friends, "It's all about perspective." SO OPEN YOUR EYES, let's examine life.

Man, you know what's really a bone-tickler? 

That is your man, Jordan. YOUR MAN... And titties. See, my roommates and I have this trashy lil' game— whenever a-not-so-eye-pleasing person is spotted, it's a race to assign them to one of your friends as "YOUR MAN!" It's a bitch of a sport, but at least it gets us through the day. Make peace with yourself before attempting to play. 

OH, I have ADHD so be prepared, it can get out of hand.